Client Development Self Sabotage

Developing the Next Generation of Rainmakers Client Development: Self Sabotage Why are you afraid of attempting to attract new clients? If you are like me, it is because of the pain you feel when you don’t win the client. Sometimes it is just easier to not try rather than to try and lose. Seth Godin talks about the “Lizard Brain”  (Click for a blog)in his book Linchpin. Here he talks about it. He says: It’s safer to fail small.   I have been trying to place what happened to me that created my “Lizard Brain.” It could have been falling off my bicycle when I was learning, but I don’t think so. It could have been missing a fast break lay up in a close game in high school, but again I don’t think so. I believe I was cruising along really well, feeling confident, when all of a sudden I was rejected by one of the most beautiful and cool girls I met while in high school. We lived in Lombard, a Chicago suburb and I went to Glenbard East High School. She was the daughter of my mother’s Longwood college (Farmville, VA) classmate and lived in Glen Ellyn, where she attended Glenbard West High School.   Photo of Glen Ellyn It seems our mothers thought it would be really neat for us to go on a blind date. I thought the idea was awful, and looking back I bet she thought the same. But, our mothers insisted. I remember driving to her house fully expecting to meet someone I would immediately not like. Then I expected we would make the date a short one, make a report to our mothers and go on our merry way. I was 17, at the time, but I still remember standing near the stairs in her house and watching this beautiful, sophisticated high school junior walk down the stairs. If someone had taken a photo of me, I am sure I looked like I had never seen a pretty girl before. I can’t remember ever being nervous while dating in high school, but that night I was. I had not expected the date to matter, but all of a sudden it did. I REALLY wanted to make a good first impression. You know how this story ends, right? After that first date, I called and tried to get a second one. It took some time, but eventually I figured out she wasn’t interested. Well, that’s my story. I’ve confessed. I think that one rejection created my “Lizard Brain,” that made me fear being turned down. Want to learn more about your Lizard Brain? Do a search on Google for quotes from Linchpin, or just read the book. I like this quote: The secret to being wrong isn’t to avoid being wrong! The secret is being willing to be wrong. The secret is realizing that wrong isn’t fatal. What’s your story? When did your “Lizard Brain” stop you from taking chances?   I practiced law for 37 years developing a national construction law practice representing some of the top highway and transportation construction contractors in the US.